Review: Amy & Matthew - A Love Story by Cammie McGovern

I was immediately drawn to the bright, textured cover of this book in the bookstore, and when I read that it was about a boy with OCD and a girl with cerebral palsy falling in love I knew I had to buy it. These are not the kind of characters you often see in YA, and I was curious about how they would be handled. Having anxiety myself, I was especially interested in seeing how Matthew's condition was explored.

I have to say initially it made me really anxious. Matthew's worries are not my worries, and yet they did spike my anxiety a bit. It's probably impossible not to feel a little anxious if you're putting yourself in the shoes of such an anxious character. Once I got more lost in the story I stopped worrying so much and started appreciating the way Matthew's OCD had been written. It was really well done, very realistic without being completely over the top. There were lots of little things that people with no experience with such a condition probably wouldn't even notice, but for me it was incredibly validating.

As far as Amy is concerned, I don't know a great deal about cerebral palsy, so I couldn't judge how accurate the depiction of her situation was, but it certainly seemed authentic. More than anything, you really get the sense of how frustrated Amy is, and how incredibly isolated and lonely she can be at times. Through both her and Matthew's points of view, the novel explores the notion of control - or lack thereof - over your own body and actions and how that impacts your emotions. Both of these characters are trapped in their bodies in very different ways, and as they connect with each other their own worlds begin to expand and it's quite wonderful to follow.

But this book is about so much more than disabilities. Indeed, as Amy and Matthew strive to be seen as something other than disabled or disordered, they become some of the most complex and fully realised characters I've read in YA in a long time. They do amazing things but importantly they also screw up really really badly. They love each other, but they also hurt each other. It can be frustrating to read but it's also an important part of their growth, and part of what's make them great as characters. They're not martyrs or symbols, they're people. People make mistakes. And sometimes you love them all the more for it.

The secondary characters are also incredibly well developed in this book, and I especially loved the changing relationships Amy has with her peer helpers (of which Matthew is one), and Matthew has with his new co-workers at the local cinema. Their families also play important parts, and while it's hard not to hate them at times, you also sympathise with them.

The dual third person narration is really effective in telling both Amy and Matthew's individual and interconnected stories; it's great to be able to see how they see themselves and then how they're seen by others. Ultimately the book is about finding yourself and growing into the person you want to be,  as well as the important relationships you forge along the way. Beginning in the last year of high school and going through to the first year post-high school for Amy and Matthew, it is a true coming of age story - unique, emotional, messy and beautiful.

Rating: 4/5

Related
I was inpsired by Mands to have a go at matching nails with this fun cover, so here's my crappy picture of that!

Fine Print
Published: MacMillan Children's Books, March 2014
Get It: Book Depository

Friday Link Dump: Coverflips, Face-melds and Disney Students

-Maureen Johnson challenged her Twitter followers to flip the gendered design of famous books, with very interesting results.

-The CW picks up more YA-inspired TV series.

-Here's what Disney characters would look like as modern-day college students.

-Beyond Blue released a great ad about anxiety this week, while Hyperbole and A Half is back from a long hiatus to discuss depression in her own awesome way.

-Interspecies friendships are probably my favourite thing ever.

-Closely followed by these face-melds from Team Coco.

-I also got a giggle out of this The Walking Dead bad lip read.

Talking Point: Why Do You Love Stories?

 
If you've spent more than five seconds on my blog, you'll know that I love stories. It kind of goes without saying. Books are one of my favourite things in the entire world - and I also adore movies, TV shows, muscials, plays... you name it, if it's got a narrative, chances are I'll enjoy it. I have always been this way. I think it's what draws me to writing; the idea of creating my own stories is so incredibly exciting (if slightly daunting).

Aside from a love of stories, there's another thing about me that has always been true: I'm a worrier. I get anxious a lot. But over the past couple of years, for various reasons, that anxiety has transformed from a little yapping dog that's kind of annoying, but easily dismissed, into a ginormous, three-headed beast with fangs as big as a football player and a bite that's most definitely worse than its bark. Why am I telling you this? Well, the thing about this beast is that it makes me question a lot things. Things I love. Things that make me who I am.

Since yesterday, that thing has been stories. Out of nowhere, the thought popped into my mind: "Why do you love stories so much? It must mean there's something wrong with you or something is missing from your life if you have to spend so much time in fictional worlds."

I immediately dismissed this thought as irrational and completely untrue. But while that would have shut up that little yapping dog, the beast is all...

I know, logically, that my affinity for fiction in no way limits my ability to live a full life. I have wonderful relationships, a great job, I travel... I live. And I know I have always loved stories and have never really used them as an escape because I couldn't bear real life - instead, I saw them as gateways to magical worlds. A bit of entertainment. A way to learn and understand more. Mostly, pure fun. It's not like I'm walking around thinking fiction is better than real life or caring more about fictional characters than real people (much)(jokes!)(kinda)(no really). I've never used stories as a substitute for real life. They have always been just stories. Stories that I love, hate, laugh at, cry about... but at the end of the day, I close the book or switch the TV off and get on with, y'know, living.

All of what I've just written makes complete sense to me. But the anxious part of me? It doesn't like logic. It doesn't like rationalising. It just likes to tell me I'm pathetic. The worst part is now I don't want to pick up a book, I don't want to watch TV or a movie... and I don't know what to do with myself. I'm doubting my long-held dream to write my own book. The anxious part of me says, "see, you're so inadequate that you feel the need to create new worlds and new people because you're not enough." Now, once again, I know this isn't true (how insulting to all the amazing authors out there if I thought it was!) but that doesn't stop me from doubting myself.

It hurts. Because I love stories, whether I'm reading them, watching them, or writing them. But right now I can't enjoy them as I usually do -  a feeling which just reinforces the negative cycle that I somehow can't live in the real world. That I'm somehow not enough.

The truth is, I guess I do need stories. Not to survive, but, to paraphrase C. S. Lewis, to make survival worth it. Because stories? They bring joy, and hope, and beauty, and inspiration, and perspective, and empathy, and connection, and understanding, and knowledge, and a thousand other things that are good and wonderful and help give meaning to life.

Now if I can only get that through my own thick head, I might be get somewhere.

Do you think stories are important?